By Bridie Bolger ’24
Upon receiving the news of an away game for Boys Varsity Hockey on Wednesday this week, Mr. McMann checked his email to see if Alex LoGuercio ‘24 and Corbin Carkner ‘25 were really allowed to leave class at the time they had communicated to him. While the dynamic duo of The Frederick Gunn School’s team of Highlander writers had previously stated 11:00 am for their departure time on Wednesday, February 21, the coach’s email cited 11:30 as the proper time for the players’ departure. This was knowledge, dear reader, which had been hidden from the students’ eyes, as they had no idea the lie would be caught by the infamous campus detective, Bart.
Upon his mind-blowing discovery, Mr. McMann spent time contemplating a possible “solution” (punishment) along with his life choices. Finally, the director settled on the most dangerous task for the boys to make up for their mistakes: karaoke. Though they were first obligated to ‘’splain themselves’ (like Lucy Mcmann) in a semi-Jeffersonian debate format, apologizing for their error, that was not enough to save them from the embarrassment of singing for the entirety of the journalism class in CJD.
The boys gathered by the front window back to the quad. Their terrified eyes darted around the room, looking for a student savior, but alas, there was none in sight. The McMann was unstoppable and slowly typed ‘you-rube’ into the class TV. After correcting the typo, he asked for song recommendations from the students (as we know, the value of a jury of peers could never be understated), who collectively settled on ‘I Want It That Way,’ by the Backstreet Boys.
LoGuercio and Carkner began. Viewing the lyrics on their phones, their off-key singing filled CJD with a sound akin to that of lowly-pitched dying cats. Recorded from all sides, the duo somehow survived what would have been annihilating humiliation despite having seemingly no knowledge of the song’s rhythm or melody. The Highlander, unfortunately, cannot print videos (trust, we wish we could). Still, if you desire to see the glorious video of up-and-coming pop stars Alex LoGuercio and Corbin Carkner, you can certainly ask any member of the Highlander News Staff to provide it to you!
